I am sorry for the silence, I have had some major life changes and unfortunately I haven't been able to update my blog as much as I would want to, However these are good life changes but I believe better time management on my part, will assist me in updating my blogs as often as I would like and of course you would hope.
I have had a lot on my mind in relation to friendship and for a long time, I could not articulate my thoughts well enough to sound diplomatic but at the same time to get my point across the way I want it to be heard. I figured there is really no diplomatic way to speak from your heart so here it goes.
I recognise I not perfect, I recognise I have certain traits that may or may not rub people in the right way However I make no apology for who I am because I sincerely believe that above all I am who I am. I am true to myself and pretending to be something or someone I am not will not be fair on me and most importantly you. Unfortunately in most cases most people misunderstand who I am and what I represent and for those reasons may not necessarily want to be in presence at all times...and to be honest thats totally fine. Sometimes I dont want to be in your presence either. Doesnt mean I dont like you and respect you, it just means for that period of time the vibe is off and I may need to pull back and regroup, get my thoughts together and probably just get over whatever is bugging me at that particular time to be able to continue my friendship.
When I build relationships with anyone, regardless of the context my goal is to make that relationship last. Of course everyday is a learning process for me. Each day I learn something about the person I like or may not like but ultimately after a period of time, I weigh the friendship analyse it from all angles and then make a decision if this friendship is worth my time or not. If I realise its not worth my time, I gradually pull away and move on with my life, if it is worth my time, I invest all my energy time and space into the relationship to make it work. However, at times I have invested in a friendship where there was no reciprocrity.(sp) Those are the times I begin to wonder why? Is there a problem with me thats why the person can't be bothered to work on the friendship or have I been blinded for so long that I didnt realise the was r eally no friendship?
Moving on...I am an honest person. Sometimes brutally honest and affectionately called by a few as a bitch and you know what? I really dont care! I believe that when I am in a relationship with someone its important to be honest at all cost. Of course I have told that occassional white lie to boost the persons self esteem and thats only because I genuinely care about the persons well being and at that particular moment being brutal honest will do more harm than good so why can't people do the same with me?
I lose a friend every once in awhile and sometimes I can't be bothered;glad they are gone other times I really wish there was something I could do to bring them back but I am learning that sometimes letting go is whats important and I also learn that what I want in life is also very important and how I need to be treated is also very important. I also learnt that when you are at fault with a friend its important to apologise and make the situation right. We all have pride and at times we let our pride get the most of us but if you genuinely love and care about someone, its important to put your pride aside and ask for forgiveness because you know what? Sometimes thats all they want to hear to forgive you. I know with me thats all I want to hear. Someone genuinely sorry for what they have done and is asking forgiveness.
So here is my blog...might be awhile till I get to another one but i hope you enjoy this.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Wednesday evening
I haven't blogged in awhile and figured I should use this free time at work to blog...Ohh yes! I did say work! I finally found a job yay!!! Its definitely not my dream job but its good so far, its paying bills and most importantly getting me out of the house. Hopefully with this new job me leaving the house more often will help me lose the weight I gained while laying up on my couch mopping about not having a job. School started as well! Yay!! its going to be a long 8 months though. 12 courses 8 months...definitely a challenge but not impossible!
So i dont really have much to say although I should since its been awhile but I guess the only thing I really want to say is, Ladies, know your worth. Do not put up with any crap any guy is dishing out to you! Remember you are worthy of any man's love so if they are not giving it to you, pack your bags and keep it moving. Any man who makes you question whether you are worthy or not should not be tolerated. I am sick and tired of hearing girls going through very annoying situations that they can easily walk away from but choose not to. Yes if you are married and you have kids it might be a little harder to just get up and leave considering all the legalities involved but it still is not a good enough excuse to stay. When you are not legally bound to the man then please you shouldnt even think about whether you should stay and go. I am not saying men shouldnt up and leave when things are bad either because they should. I guess what I am trying to say is, know your worth. Understand that you are worth more than you might think you are and thus only accept to be treated with the greatest respect! If your partner can't offer you that then its time to keep it moving because trust me there is someone out there who is more than willing to show you that respect
Peace
So i dont really have much to say although I should since its been awhile but I guess the only thing I really want to say is, Ladies, know your worth. Do not put up with any crap any guy is dishing out to you! Remember you are worthy of any man's love so if they are not giving it to you, pack your bags and keep it moving. Any man who makes you question whether you are worthy or not should not be tolerated. I am sick and tired of hearing girls going through very annoying situations that they can easily walk away from but choose not to. Yes if you are married and you have kids it might be a little harder to just get up and leave considering all the legalities involved but it still is not a good enough excuse to stay. When you are not legally bound to the man then please you shouldnt even think about whether you should stay and go. I am not saying men shouldnt up and leave when things are bad either because they should. I guess what I am trying to say is, know your worth. Understand that you are worth more than you might think you are and thus only accept to be treated with the greatest respect! If your partner can't offer you that then its time to keep it moving because trust me there is someone out there who is more than willing to show you that respect
Peace
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
No Longer in Fashion.
I live in Canada, a country that is admired for its multiculturalism, the ability to practise your culture with no discrimination. A mosaic of cultures and people, admired for its diversity and its so called "no racism exist here" mindset. People can safely date people from other races and cultures and all they will exprience is the occasional glance and most times its to look at what they have on and not necessarily their skin tone. However, with all this in place, does it mean that someone has to face the consequences of all this diversity? Do some people have to go neglected because the masses are happy and thus the percentage of unhappy people are soo few its almost insignificant? However, should someone's happiness be put aside because most people are happy? Shouldnt every one find happiness?
Why all this talk about culture and diversity?Well its simple. The black women in Canada or rather most black women in Canada are suffering. We are neglected, we are thrown aside like day old bread. Very few people will pick it up and they only do because its on sale. Why should black women suffer? And why are they suffering.
I have walked the streets here and noticed that most black women today are single mainly for two reasons. 1. Most black women are only interested in Dating Black men, 2. Quite a number of Black men are dating non black women.
I have heard a variety of reasons for their choice in non black. A few that ticked me off were, A black woman is too hard headed, too independent. Come on too strong. Why should we became something we are not to secure a black man?
So lets put the whole black men are dating only white women argument for a minute. How about black men who do not date dark skinned black women. Suddenly being dark skin has become a crime. Why don't our own men love the variety in our skin? Why do they choose to date a black women only if she is closer in color to the white woman?
Dont get me wrong, I am not saying I do not believe in interracial marriages, i strongly believe that if you choose to marry someone black, white, asian, or whatever else you must choose to marry them because they possess personality traits that you find attractive, Being dark skinned or light skinned should have nothing to do with why you choose to marry that person. Because White or black, i can guarentee there are both good and bad in either group so the skin color should and must have nothing to do with your choice. But what makes people think, that dating someone of a fairer skin tone will make your life any better? Will create cuter kids, or children with easier to manage hair? When did skin color make you a better person?
A friend of mine once told me, he wants to date a woman with a lighter skin tone especially someone from somewhere else so that he could have children with a different background. In that Case then dont marry a woman from your country? Marry a woman from another country, different cultural back ground, even someone from a different city, that would mean your children has a different background.
I think its ridiculous and quite frankly pathetic when someone chooses to date a person from a different background/ or race clearly because they are from that race. How about who they are, what they want in life, how they make you feel, what they have accomplished how they treat you, their faith in God? when did everything boil down to their skin color and not who they are? Sad, I tell you Sad.
Personally I believe every human being is beautiful in their own right, and we all have different reasons for going for different people, however, when you purposely look down on your own because they do not possess the physical characterstics of another race then I believe you have a problem.
Black has already suffered enough. Many black people have felt less adequate and less beautiful than they already are, but when your own people treat you like you are not worthy how do you bounce back from that. Black is beautiful, in all its variations, but when you start to specify which black is beautiful then clearly you do not love who you are!
Why all this talk about culture and diversity?Well its simple. The black women in Canada or rather most black women in Canada are suffering. We are neglected, we are thrown aside like day old bread. Very few people will pick it up and they only do because its on sale. Why should black women suffer? And why are they suffering.
I have walked the streets here and noticed that most black women today are single mainly for two reasons. 1. Most black women are only interested in Dating Black men, 2. Quite a number of Black men are dating non black women.
I have heard a variety of reasons for their choice in non black. A few that ticked me off were, A black woman is too hard headed, too independent. Come on too strong. Why should we became something we are not to secure a black man?
So lets put the whole black men are dating only white women argument for a minute. How about black men who do not date dark skinned black women. Suddenly being dark skin has become a crime. Why don't our own men love the variety in our skin? Why do they choose to date a black women only if she is closer in color to the white woman?
Dont get me wrong, I am not saying I do not believe in interracial marriages, i strongly believe that if you choose to marry someone black, white, asian, or whatever else you must choose to marry them because they possess personality traits that you find attractive, Being dark skinned or light skinned should have nothing to do with why you choose to marry that person. Because White or black, i can guarentee there are both good and bad in either group so the skin color should and must have nothing to do with your choice. But what makes people think, that dating someone of a fairer skin tone will make your life any better? Will create cuter kids, or children with easier to manage hair? When did skin color make you a better person?
A friend of mine once told me, he wants to date a woman with a lighter skin tone especially someone from somewhere else so that he could have children with a different background. In that Case then dont marry a woman from your country? Marry a woman from another country, different cultural back ground, even someone from a different city, that would mean your children has a different background.
I think its ridiculous and quite frankly pathetic when someone chooses to date a person from a different background/ or race clearly because they are from that race. How about who they are, what they want in life, how they make you feel, what they have accomplished how they treat you, their faith in God? when did everything boil down to their skin color and not who they are? Sad, I tell you Sad.
Personally I believe every human being is beautiful in their own right, and we all have different reasons for going for different people, however, when you purposely look down on your own because they do not possess the physical characterstics of another race then I believe you have a problem.
Black has already suffered enough. Many black people have felt less adequate and less beautiful than they already are, but when your own people treat you like you are not worthy how do you bounce back from that. Black is beautiful, in all its variations, but when you start to specify which black is beautiful then clearly you do not love who you are!
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Pathetic!!
My blogs recently have been about my strugglings and my challenges and how I am dealing with them, but today this is a totally different situation. Its about us women and what we expect from men.
I am 27, I believe I am attractive, college educated, going back to school to better myself, currently unemployed but qualified for almost anything, Not necessarily a runway model, but for a plus size girl or for someone who is on the border of plus size, I think I carry myself well. I was brought up well, with good morals and I believe that any man who I may come across will be more than happy with what I bring to the table. However I am still single. Some days its by choice, other days, I just can't seem to get them to like me. Someone may call me picky, others may say I just deserve the best...Me? I think I just have a lot more work to do on myself before I can honestly go to a man and expect him to offer me more than I can offer him. However, do I think I am desperate, do i hear my biological clock ticking and ready to jump the broom? Some days I wont lie, I do feel like I am closing drawing near my expiration date, other days I am like whatever! I am young, I haven't lived enough and until i can say I have done it all I am not ready to settle down.
Reason for my banter? Well every woman is different, Some women strongly believe they have to settle down and get the ball rolling and thus if it means jumping on the next guy that walks their way then so be it. Some people dont take to rejection well and will do everything in their power to keep that man who is just itching to go. I personally think the latter woman is pathetic. I believe every woman should realise their worth and not settle for less. If a guy clearly has told you he is not interested in you and you should keep it moving then do exactly that! Trying to sit back and figure out ways to keep him is dumb... Cus clearly even if you succeed in keeping that man, he is going to make your life a living hell.
The most pathetic woman in my book is the woman who delibrately gets pregnant thinking that bringing a child into the world will keep the man. Yes we all joke around and say we would have a particular celebrities baby because he looks good but honestly most of us will not do that if the opportunity came our way. So those who do it why? Having a baby by a man who does not want you will not keep him in your life...yes he may stick around just to be an honorable man but will he be yours? Physically yes! mentally, spiritually hell no!! My question however is this, why would you want to have a baby by a man who doesnt want you? Why would you lie to him and tell him you are on birth control and then suddenly become pregnant?
Okay so it seems like the woman are to blame in this blog and quite frankly no, they are not the only ones to blame, It takes two so clearly the man is at fault as well. Fellas, I know some of you can't live without pussy. Some of you can smell pussy from miles away and find your way there but honestly and truly I do not care how weak you are when it comes to self control, If you are with a woman and you no longer want to be with her. I do not care if she ends up walking across the room every night butt ass naked. Resist yourself, pack up your bags and leave! If you choose to stay, you have no right and I mean absolutely no right to get up the next day, tell her she trapped you, demand an abortion or even worse tell her you want nothing to do with the child. If you lay your bed be prepared to lie in it, no matter the circumstances! I do not care what you have to say, Unless you were raped by her or drugged and have no idea how she managed to get you in bed, you have no excuse for not wanting to be around. It is also your responsibility to make sure there are no accidents. Yes the woman lied to you and told you she was on birth control but if you choose to lie with a woman you really dont want to be with and you are with her just for the purposes of fucking then my dear thats your fault!
So my point here today is, This whole bullshit of women having babies for men just to trap them is pathetic! It's sad! And quite frankly women like that I have no sympathy for them. If you do not believe you deserve better then thats your problem. Yes it might be a self esteem issue but at the end of the day its on you to make sure mistakes like this dont happen. I have been rejected several times, I have sat around and prayed that guy I am feening for will feen for me too however, when i get the boot and I am told no, its no! I keep it moving. Most times, I tell myself the guy is absolutely insane and has no idea what he has missed out on and I believe that shit! So if you can't do the same and you wish to stick around and force a man to be with you, then thats your problem but keep the babies out of it! Fellas if you know you dont want to be with that female, then pack your shit and leave, dont give her any excuse to believe there is hope! The biggest shit i have heard is "Ohh she is going through a rough patch, this is not the time for me to break up with her" Bullshit, you staying in her life when clearly you want out is going to make things rougher when things do get better because she is going to believe you love her and want to be with her and then when things do get better she is going to suddenly break down even further knowing you were with her only because you felt sorry for her. A woman will deal with any situation if she really wants to.
I am 27, I believe I am attractive, college educated, going back to school to better myself, currently unemployed but qualified for almost anything, Not necessarily a runway model, but for a plus size girl or for someone who is on the border of plus size, I think I carry myself well. I was brought up well, with good morals and I believe that any man who I may come across will be more than happy with what I bring to the table. However I am still single. Some days its by choice, other days, I just can't seem to get them to like me. Someone may call me picky, others may say I just deserve the best...Me? I think I just have a lot more work to do on myself before I can honestly go to a man and expect him to offer me more than I can offer him. However, do I think I am desperate, do i hear my biological clock ticking and ready to jump the broom? Some days I wont lie, I do feel like I am closing drawing near my expiration date, other days I am like whatever! I am young, I haven't lived enough and until i can say I have done it all I am not ready to settle down.
Reason for my banter? Well every woman is different, Some women strongly believe they have to settle down and get the ball rolling and thus if it means jumping on the next guy that walks their way then so be it. Some people dont take to rejection well and will do everything in their power to keep that man who is just itching to go. I personally think the latter woman is pathetic. I believe every woman should realise their worth and not settle for less. If a guy clearly has told you he is not interested in you and you should keep it moving then do exactly that! Trying to sit back and figure out ways to keep him is dumb... Cus clearly even if you succeed in keeping that man, he is going to make your life a living hell.
The most pathetic woman in my book is the woman who delibrately gets pregnant thinking that bringing a child into the world will keep the man. Yes we all joke around and say we would have a particular celebrities baby because he looks good but honestly most of us will not do that if the opportunity came our way. So those who do it why? Having a baby by a man who does not want you will not keep him in your life...yes he may stick around just to be an honorable man but will he be yours? Physically yes! mentally, spiritually hell no!! My question however is this, why would you want to have a baby by a man who doesnt want you? Why would you lie to him and tell him you are on birth control and then suddenly become pregnant?
Okay so it seems like the woman are to blame in this blog and quite frankly no, they are not the only ones to blame, It takes two so clearly the man is at fault as well. Fellas, I know some of you can't live without pussy. Some of you can smell pussy from miles away and find your way there but honestly and truly I do not care how weak you are when it comes to self control, If you are with a woman and you no longer want to be with her. I do not care if she ends up walking across the room every night butt ass naked. Resist yourself, pack up your bags and leave! If you choose to stay, you have no right and I mean absolutely no right to get up the next day, tell her she trapped you, demand an abortion or even worse tell her you want nothing to do with the child. If you lay your bed be prepared to lie in it, no matter the circumstances! I do not care what you have to say, Unless you were raped by her or drugged and have no idea how she managed to get you in bed, you have no excuse for not wanting to be around. It is also your responsibility to make sure there are no accidents. Yes the woman lied to you and told you she was on birth control but if you choose to lie with a woman you really dont want to be with and you are with her just for the purposes of fucking then my dear thats your fault!
So my point here today is, This whole bullshit of women having babies for men just to trap them is pathetic! It's sad! And quite frankly women like that I have no sympathy for them. If you do not believe you deserve better then thats your problem. Yes it might be a self esteem issue but at the end of the day its on you to make sure mistakes like this dont happen. I have been rejected several times, I have sat around and prayed that guy I am feening for will feen for me too however, when i get the boot and I am told no, its no! I keep it moving. Most times, I tell myself the guy is absolutely insane and has no idea what he has missed out on and I believe that shit! So if you can't do the same and you wish to stick around and force a man to be with you, then thats your problem but keep the babies out of it! Fellas if you know you dont want to be with that female, then pack your shit and leave, dont give her any excuse to believe there is hope! The biggest shit i have heard is "Ohh she is going through a rough patch, this is not the time for me to break up with her" Bullshit, you staying in her life when clearly you want out is going to make things rougher when things do get better because she is going to believe you love her and want to be with her and then when things do get better she is going to suddenly break down even further knowing you were with her only because you felt sorry for her. A woman will deal with any situation if she really wants to.
Saturday, August 8, 2009
5,4,3, 2,.....
Its 7:17pm Saturday August 8th and I have some ribs in the oven cooking. Can't wait to sink my teeth into them. I am sitting on my couch watching cribs and chatting while my brother is lazing around in his room. Why can't he get his ass up to go buy me my damn cake already!
I haven't been myself for the past few months. Depression has become my best friend and for a long time I didnt know if I would ever snap out of it! Its hard to snap out of it when you focus on just all the things going wrong in your life and not the good. It finally took my sister to point out everything I had going for me to make me realise how good I realy have I have it!
"Think about it" she said, " The only thing you dont have now is a job, you have your bills being paid for, you got into school, you even have the chance to go out and hang out with friends" Something you wouldnt be able to do if your situation was far worse than it is. Until you start giving God thanks for what you have, how do you expect him to bless you with what you dont have?"
It took me awhile to really think it through and I realised she was right. It could be a lot worse, There are people out there who have kids they can't feed, roofs that they can't keep over their head, and no hope. Parents with sick kids they can't afford to get the medical attention they need and wont even be able to afford to bury them if they did die, bills they can't pay and no where to turn. Who am I? with all the necessities met and even the wants met have to complain.
Its human nature though, I am pretty sure that everyone believes their situation is the worst in the world, however when you really open your eyes and look around you realise you are better off than most! its time to give thanks, Praise God for his goodness and when asking to be blessed, Ask God to bless us so we can bless others.
As I spend my last few hours of my 26th year on this planet, I am grateful. I have had a great live. Its had its ups and downs its sad moments and happy moment but all in all I am blessed! And though my life is not where I want it to be, its where it needs to be! I just continue to ask God to bless me so I can use my blessings to bless others!!
Hello 27!
I haven't been myself for the past few months. Depression has become my best friend and for a long time I didnt know if I would ever snap out of it! Its hard to snap out of it when you focus on just all the things going wrong in your life and not the good. It finally took my sister to point out everything I had going for me to make me realise how good I realy have I have it!
"Think about it" she said, " The only thing you dont have now is a job, you have your bills being paid for, you got into school, you even have the chance to go out and hang out with friends" Something you wouldnt be able to do if your situation was far worse than it is. Until you start giving God thanks for what you have, how do you expect him to bless you with what you dont have?"
It took me awhile to really think it through and I realised she was right. It could be a lot worse, There are people out there who have kids they can't feed, roofs that they can't keep over their head, and no hope. Parents with sick kids they can't afford to get the medical attention they need and wont even be able to afford to bury them if they did die, bills they can't pay and no where to turn. Who am I? with all the necessities met and even the wants met have to complain.
Its human nature though, I am pretty sure that everyone believes their situation is the worst in the world, however when you really open your eyes and look around you realise you are better off than most! its time to give thanks, Praise God for his goodness and when asking to be blessed, Ask God to bless us so we can bless others.
As I spend my last few hours of my 26th year on this planet, I am grateful. I have had a great live. Its had its ups and downs its sad moments and happy moment but all in all I am blessed! And though my life is not where I want it to be, its where it needs to be! I just continue to ask God to bless me so I can use my blessings to bless others!!
Hello 27!
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Is there an end in sight!
I am sick and tired and I am tired of being sick and tired. I take one step forward and there is always something that takes me 10 steps back. Honestly is it easier to just quit and accept my fate that things are not going to change, or keep going until I come out of this storm. Some days I really wonder if there is an end in sight. I wonder if I am ever going to say its over! Its my time now!
I have been unemployed since Janurary. Between Janurary and now, I havent even been given so much as a whisper. What is going on? Am I applying for all the wrong jobs? Are my expectations too high or too low? Are people not hiring? Is my name just too complicated for them to pronounce so they dont bother to look at my resume at all? I mean what is it? Is it racial? ARe there really no jobs out there. I dont get it! I apply for a job, I get the "We are sorry although you are qualified for this position we found someone who is more suitable for the job" However you go back days later and here is the job posted still hiring. So what is the deal? I can't take it no more!
You go to school, pay obscene amounts of money to get a college education, you take all the right classes get all the right grades and you come out of college with your bright shiny degree with bright hopes, thinking you are going to have all these jobs thrown in your face that it will even be hard to choose. 3 months go by nothing..You stay hopeful and just say to yourself it usually takes 6 months, 6 months roll by, you are getting antsy but you still remain hopeful, next you know its been almost a year and not even a phone call to say, we want to interview. What is going on? Is it really because of the bad economy or are companies just refusing to hire you! I know I am not alone and I know there is an end in sight, but when bill collectors dont care, and in order to survive you still need to buy food to stay alive so you can keep applying for work but at the end of the day you spending money you dont have, bills are going un paid, bill collectors hounding your ass like they depend on your money to pay their bills and depression seems to be your new best friend.
When will this end? How will it end? They say going back to school is the best option, but how do you go to school if you can't even get a loan because you dont have a job and your credit is probably jacked cus you can't pay your bills. I mean its a catch 22. Its easy to say life sucks but it doesnt, just everything in it that sucks! God help us! We need a break and we need a break fast!!
I have been unemployed since Janurary. Between Janurary and now, I havent even been given so much as a whisper. What is going on? Am I applying for all the wrong jobs? Are my expectations too high or too low? Are people not hiring? Is my name just too complicated for them to pronounce so they dont bother to look at my resume at all? I mean what is it? Is it racial? ARe there really no jobs out there. I dont get it! I apply for a job, I get the "We are sorry although you are qualified for this position we found someone who is more suitable for the job" However you go back days later and here is the job posted still hiring. So what is the deal? I can't take it no more!
You go to school, pay obscene amounts of money to get a college education, you take all the right classes get all the right grades and you come out of college with your bright shiny degree with bright hopes, thinking you are going to have all these jobs thrown in your face that it will even be hard to choose. 3 months go by nothing..You stay hopeful and just say to yourself it usually takes 6 months, 6 months roll by, you are getting antsy but you still remain hopeful, next you know its been almost a year and not even a phone call to say, we want to interview. What is going on? Is it really because of the bad economy or are companies just refusing to hire you! I know I am not alone and I know there is an end in sight, but when bill collectors dont care, and in order to survive you still need to buy food to stay alive so you can keep applying for work but at the end of the day you spending money you dont have, bills are going un paid, bill collectors hounding your ass like they depend on your money to pay their bills and depression seems to be your new best friend.
When will this end? How will it end? They say going back to school is the best option, but how do you go to school if you can't even get a loan because you dont have a job and your credit is probably jacked cus you can't pay your bills. I mean its a catch 22. Its easy to say life sucks but it doesnt, just everything in it that sucks! God help us! We need a break and we need a break fast!!
Friday, July 17, 2009
Frustrations!
Am I too picky? Are my expectations too high for myself that it is not unattainable? Should I settle for less just so I can say at least I have it or should I still aim high and hope something works out sooner than later although sooner seems to be later these days. I keep hearing this over and over and over again, " At least its better than nothing" " You have to start somewhere" I know! I Know!! But honestly why should I settle for less if I can have it all? It might take me a little longer but I will get there!
Here is what I believe. I graduated from high school almost 8 years ago, with good grades,Got me into University, did alright there and graduated with honors...4 years ago. I up and moved to the States, Didnt have the greatest job in the world but it was better than nothing and now I am back here with some experience under my belt. Maybe not the best of experience but enough to put me one step ahead of the high schoolers and university students. I am going back to school in the fall to get a certificate which will make me even more marketable and need I say qualified for even a better job. I haven't worked in 7 months, I know people who havent worked in a year but then all I get are rejection letters upon rejection letters...bills need to be paid and they are being paid but at the bare minimum...Fortunately I have great parents that understand my struggle and are willing to help me till I can do it on my own. At 27 I really dont want their help but unfortunately I need their help. I pray its not forever but right now who knows when forever will end.
However, It may seem like I am too proud, or I feel I am better than others but I believe that after paying 10s of thousands of dollars to get a university degree, even more to pay for a year of an mba and going to invest a little big more to get a certificate, I should not have to settle for a job, flipping burgers, or running groceries through a register or telling young teenagers that they should choose the blue top over the yellow top even though I know well and well they are going to chose both because daddy is paying just so i can say I have a pay check coming in! Dont get me wrong, I am not waiting for a job in my field before I accept a position or I am not waiting for a 6 figure job before I get back in the work field but I still do not think I should lower my standards just so I can have a pay check, A pay check that I will never see because, 3/4 of it will go towards transportation to work, and the other 1/4 will go towards paying for my lunch or dinner when I am at work. I mean at the end is it worth it?
People keep saying ohh at least its a pay check at least you have a job, I mean it wont be forever so why dont you just do that until something else comes my way and I mean I could, but the question I ask these people( and I am sure they will lie because they dont have to worry about having to go through this) is " If you were in my shoes, will you flip burgers? or run groceries through a cash machine after working for at least 2 years in your field, making decent money just so you can say you have a job?" In my opinion if you do choose to do that, then I say, you dont think you deserve better and you dont think you will get better. Times are rough people are struggling, the job market is even more competitive than it used to be, but do you have to lower your standards drastically just to get a job? A job you will quit in a matter of days because you absolutely can't stand it even though you are getting a pay check? Seriously I want you to think long and hard before responding? I know your answer will be no in your head because I know a few people who are in my shoes struggling just like me and they feel the exact same way I do, They refuse to go for that minimum flipping burgers job because they believe they deserve better. Trust me if you go what we are going through you will do the same!
So please, I understand you are concerned about me and you want me to have a job, but dont tell me to lower my standards just to have one. I will take the receptionist job because through there I can be promoted to something else, or instead of the Business Analyst position I want, i will take the jr analyst position just to get my foot in that door I might even take the secretary job working for the president just so I can get my feet wet, I will even be the assistant manager at old navy but dont tell me to be at cash ringing stuff through the register or dont ask me to flip burgers. If you wouldnt do it, dont expect me to. And if you choose to do it, then thats on you...but I am not you!
Here is what I believe. I graduated from high school almost 8 years ago, with good grades,Got me into University, did alright there and graduated with honors...4 years ago. I up and moved to the States, Didnt have the greatest job in the world but it was better than nothing and now I am back here with some experience under my belt. Maybe not the best of experience but enough to put me one step ahead of the high schoolers and university students. I am going back to school in the fall to get a certificate which will make me even more marketable and need I say qualified for even a better job. I haven't worked in 7 months, I know people who havent worked in a year but then all I get are rejection letters upon rejection letters...bills need to be paid and they are being paid but at the bare minimum...Fortunately I have great parents that understand my struggle and are willing to help me till I can do it on my own. At 27 I really dont want their help but unfortunately I need their help. I pray its not forever but right now who knows when forever will end.
However, It may seem like I am too proud, or I feel I am better than others but I believe that after paying 10s of thousands of dollars to get a university degree, even more to pay for a year of an mba and going to invest a little big more to get a certificate, I should not have to settle for a job, flipping burgers, or running groceries through a register or telling young teenagers that they should choose the blue top over the yellow top even though I know well and well they are going to chose both because daddy is paying just so i can say I have a pay check coming in! Dont get me wrong, I am not waiting for a job in my field before I accept a position or I am not waiting for a 6 figure job before I get back in the work field but I still do not think I should lower my standards just so I can have a pay check, A pay check that I will never see because, 3/4 of it will go towards transportation to work, and the other 1/4 will go towards paying for my lunch or dinner when I am at work. I mean at the end is it worth it?
People keep saying ohh at least its a pay check at least you have a job, I mean it wont be forever so why dont you just do that until something else comes my way and I mean I could, but the question I ask these people( and I am sure they will lie because they dont have to worry about having to go through this) is " If you were in my shoes, will you flip burgers? or run groceries through a cash machine after working for at least 2 years in your field, making decent money just so you can say you have a job?" In my opinion if you do choose to do that, then I say, you dont think you deserve better and you dont think you will get better. Times are rough people are struggling, the job market is even more competitive than it used to be, but do you have to lower your standards drastically just to get a job? A job you will quit in a matter of days because you absolutely can't stand it even though you are getting a pay check? Seriously I want you to think long and hard before responding? I know your answer will be no in your head because I know a few people who are in my shoes struggling just like me and they feel the exact same way I do, They refuse to go for that minimum flipping burgers job because they believe they deserve better. Trust me if you go what we are going through you will do the same!
So please, I understand you are concerned about me and you want me to have a job, but dont tell me to lower my standards just to have one. I will take the receptionist job because through there I can be promoted to something else, or instead of the Business Analyst position I want, i will take the jr analyst position just to get my foot in that door I might even take the secretary job working for the president just so I can get my feet wet, I will even be the assistant manager at old navy but dont tell me to be at cash ringing stuff through the register or dont ask me to flip burgers. If you wouldnt do it, dont expect me to. And if you choose to do it, then thats on you...but I am not you!
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